Are firstborn kids really destined to be more successful than their siblings? Do all middle children have jealousy issues? If you’re the baby of the family, are you actually the most financially irresponsible? (Hey, you might be the most fun parent, though.) According to research, there’s evidence to back up these clichés, and birth order does, indeed, affect your personality. Below, I’m breaking down exactly how the pecking order determines the type of person you are, from the responsible and achievement-driven oldest sibling to the free-spirited youngsters of the family.
Oldest? Youngest? Middle? Here’s What Your Birth Order Says About Your Personality
the stereotypes are *mostly* true
Meet the Experts
- Heather Hagen is the executive director of clinical outpatient services with Newport Healthcare, a national mental healthcare provider. Hagen specializes in family therapy and has over 20 years of experience. She holds a masters degree in psychology and marriage/family therapy from Chapman University, and has been featured in outlets such as Parade, Prevention and Shape.
- Dr. Sanam Hafeez is a New York City-based neuropsychologist and director of Comprehend the Mind, a psychological practice that treats learning disorders, anxiety, depression and other psychopathological disorders. Dr. Hafeez obtained her Doctor of Psychology at Hofstra University and completed her post-doctoral training in neuropsychology and developmental pediatrics at Coney Island Hospital.
Oldest Siblings Are Driven, Natural Leaders
You’re likely a natural-born leader. Responsible, obedient and loyal, you’re likelier to pursue higher education than your younger siblings, per a 2003 study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. And, a 2017 paper reports that oldest children are up to 30 percent likelier to land a higher-paying management position, such as CEO, than later-born children. As psychologist Heather Hagen previously explained to me, “[Firstborns are] often achievement oriented, and tend to be more responsible. They typically take charge of their younger siblings at an earlier age.” Dr. Hafeez adds, “First-borns are often seen as responsible, reliable and leaders, typically being more achievement-oriented and conscientious due to feeling pressure to meet parental expectations.”
Middleborns Keep the Peace
Middle children “are far less likely than their siblings to be in therapy, get divorced or be neurotic," say the authors of The Secret Power of Middle Children. Peacekeeping and empathetic, you are probably a great team player. “A middle child tends to be the one that’s keeping the peace,” Hagen notes. “They’re typically adaptable because they have to be—they take stock of what’s currently going on in the family and adjust accordingly.” But hey, Miss Independent: You can be a leader, too. Abraham Lincoln, Bill Gates, Madonna and Martin Luther King Jr.? All middle children. Patient, social and open to compromise, you are likely an excellent negotiator (see also that thing about being less likely to get divorced). On the flip side, there’s also a whole “syndrome” devoted to your overlooked place in the pecking order. Middle children have a hard time saying no and “have lower self-esteem than other birth orders because of their lack of uniqueness and attention at home,” writes expert Katrin Schumann in Psychology Today.
Youngest Children Take Risks
According to a 1990 study at UC Berkeley, youngest children are more likely to take risks and be open to new experiences—hence your reputation as a rebel. You’re also more relaxed and easygoing than your siblings (and with less discipline but lots of parental attention, why wouldn’t you be?) and more likely to seek out an artistic occupation—or work in sales.
“Youngest children are described as outgoing, attention-seeking and charming, and they might be more rebellious and willing to take risks, having less pressure to conform to parental expectation,” Dr. Hafeez tells me.
In short, you’re the life of the party. But “babies” of the family are often treated as helpless out of habit—and frequently for far too long. As a result, youngest sibs are found to be the most financially irresponsible. On the upside, you may be just as funny as you think you are. Want indisputable evidence? Tina Fey, Ricky Gervais, Eddie Murphy and Stephen Colbert are all the youngest kids in their families.